Bitey

mander.xyz/pictrs/image/ddb10aaa-12d7-4b7f-82ec…

submitted a week ago by fossilesque

Bitey
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Correct me if I’m wrong…. But isn’t finding a new bacteria rather common for people who look at bacteria?

Yes.

For a long time identifying bacteria required growing them on different media. If then bacteria didn't grow on the media,, we didn't know what it was. However for most pathogenic bacterium we did figure out how to culture them.

Then molecular biology advanced to a level where we can amplify and sequence a single bacterium's DNA. This has led to a continuous stream of new species discoveries from different environments.

Finding a new pathogenic bacteria for humans is still a rare discovery.

20 years later...

Kid: Dad, why did everybody turn into cat-zombies?

Dad: They caught Dipshit Nigel Disease, son.

Way to ruin that guy's Plague Inc run, man.

For science!

🫱😾

If that happened to me, and I got rid of it, I'd ask if the infection could be named after me.

I want it to be remembered that I won.

Nah. They would name it Spspspspspiosis.

That sounds more like the name of the treatment than of the bacteria itself.

Really? You want an annoying disease to be named after you? Like "fuck me i got the stoy today"

I would want them to let me choose the name.

I'd want to have them to name it after me. "Dave Fever" has a ring to it.

You've already got a syndrome, don't be greedy

The Dave Plague sounds pretty amazing

What's Dave syndrome?

Sure, he gave permission for them to publish the paper about him. But, did he give them permission to address him solely as "48 year old obese man?"

That is literally adding insult to injury.

I call the big one bitey!

The most important part is missing: Did he got to name the bacteria?

I foster extra spicy kittens and tame them so they can be adopted. Each time one bites me I think about how I have almost no insurance and this could be the one that unalives me. Those puncture bites are amazing. This little predator weighing less than 1% what I do can do me in with just their teeth.

My pet geese are so much safer.

spicy kitten

If it looks like this, it's a lynx.

This spicy puppy was recued from a frozen lake and driven to the vet.

"I am too cold to do anything other than lay here, otherwise you'd get a bite."

That's a werewolf kitten, you can't fool me

No, these are werewolf cats

No lynx native to my area. But a bobcat is always an option. Some legends tell of cougars. I can always hope.

Foster also, just had a foster fail.

But man, even if it killed me, still totally worth it.

We had four cats die within a year. All orange boys.

Then one day I get a call from a place I'm doing Trap Neuter Release. Some mom just dropped three kids on a porch. I go grab the kids and set a trap for mom. I get the kids home. Three orange girls, two are bobtails. I've been on the hunt for an orange girl for years. Jackpot.

Really hoping we get mom because these are bottle babies. Get mom. Orange girl with even less tail.

I know I'm probably keeping mom no matter how feral she is. Definitely one of the kids too.

Time to make the decision. Which kid to keep. Wife vetoes me. We are keeping them all. Plus two more orange girls that will show up over the year. I have six orange girls. Probably more than anyone on the east coast. So much foster fail. So few braincells.

Eventually tame mom after 12 months and multiple attempts on my life.
So many orange girls.

Omg.

We were up to 6, chain reaction of cats really.

Last two of those, found one standinf in traffic, ran out and scoped her up, we were close ever since. Second was my wife's foster fail, turned out she was pregnant and didn't know.

Last one was a tortie who got attached to me, haven't done a ginger yet, used to do a ton of bottle babies, those were painful.

Orange cats are so special and unique. I have two brothers and they couldn't be more different personality wise. They're my first oranges. One weighs 22 pounds and the other weighs 10.

I'm not doing any more bottle babies until I'm collecting Social Security and don't have to work or sleep.

Omg they're exhausting but the best, they took me (and my wife) a lot of work at first to get the trick of feeding, and the pee/poo thing is unpleasant, but they're so incredibly cute and sweet, our first fail is a bb.

But they often don't litter train as easily and make a mess, so thats a problem, they're a ton of work on par with a human baby.

Livin the dream

(We have one buttery ginger. Smart enough to just be a complete arsehat)

Oh this is how we all turn into cat girls

Thanks for the screenshot but where is the link?

I don't know what the rest think, but if you can't find an article when you know the name of the site, the name of the author, the date and the title I think it's more appropriate if you don't get a link.

Link for convenience. This could be AI generated garbage.

We are going to be fucked when ai learns to write articles and attach them to links

Cat haters violently rubbing their hands...

How do you *violently* rub your hands? Do you mean excitedly?

Did you ever play Mario Party and try to win the raft game?

Like that but with both hands, the skin just rubs off

You imagine that you're grinding up little tiny people between your hands while giving an over-the-top maniacal laugh.

You rub them so hard it starts producing smoke!

That's a great picture

I too really want to bite that pink nose in the picture

All the people who let their cats roam, run the risk of this and other horrible things. If cat owners are too selfish to care about the local ecosystem and their neighbors, maybe their and their Kitty's safety will get them to listen.

Found a half a cat in my yard a few weeks back, cause the neighbors wouldn't fucking listen when I kept telling them that there are coyotes in our area

... What's the meme here?

Involves a cat, well known meme vehicle for millennia

Thought that was avocado toast.

this isn't a meme, this is a cocktease headline at an interesting story.

you have delivered neither funni nor wow.

shame.

Wow, a new unknown bacteria! Probably two pills of any generic antibiotic and it's gone! Oh no, let me never pet a stray ever again.

Last year one guy in England went outside for a walk, slipped and fell hitting his head against the pavement -- he ended up in a hospital. Me, I now do not recommend anyone in the world ever leaves the premises of their apartment.

Read the article, he was on a cocktail of generic antibiotics and still needed iv vancomycin

To be fair, the sub headline says "was bit by" so I wouldn't hope for any journalistic excellence

Read the article

Challenge difficulty: impossible

Me, I now do not recommend anyone in the world ever leaves the premises of their apartment.

Based on my experiences, it's not a good idea and should be avoided if possible.