TIL , Why Do Animals Keep Evolving into Crabs?

submitted a week ago by ooli@lemmy.world edited a week ago

www.scientificamerican.com/article/why-do-anima…

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60 Comments

a week ago , edited a week ago

convergent evolution is such a head scratcher, nature is full of puzzles, like how humans became to dominate this world, yet a human allegedly wrote the title of this post

Tittle*

a week ago

*Titties

a week ago

TIL why do words keep evolving into titties?

Because everyone likes titties

a week ago

World cold and hard. Titty warm and soft.

They keep evolving into pigs too.

Peccary:

Tapir:

a week ago

Capybara:

Thanks, I knew there was at least one more. I feel like there's something else I'm not thinking of as well but I can't place it.

I feel like there's something else

yes, pigs

IANAS, but it sure seems like most of these pig fuckers just went fully off-road genetically as soon as their two main external sphincters formed during mitosis, and focused everything else afterward on that core concept: Eat & Shit. (punctuation optional; creative emphasis, arrangement, spelling, etc. promoted)

a week ago

Guinea pigs perhaps? I didn't post them because capy represents them as Caviidae.

I think I was thinking of javelina, but they're related to peccaries.

I thought those were technically rodents?

a week ago , edited 4 days ago

They are, just like guinea pigs (their smaller relative). It's just that the bauplan is rather close to a pig - stubby legs, roundy body, stubby tail.

I guess that just like non-crustacean peak performance is to become crab-like, mammal peak performance is to become pig-like? Cats*, humans, dogs, we'll eventually get porcinised!

*except my cat. She's a Schweinekatze (pig-cat) so she's *already* pig-like.

Into two pigs? How often?

Twice

a week ago

I thought it was once every other pig, thanks for the info!

a week ago , edited a week ago

It's the same reason both bats and birds have wings.

This article is trash. It's been established for a long time that bats have wings to frighten criminals.

the tasty king crab that's coveted as a seafood delicacy, aren't even technically "true crabs."

I'm not ready for this today.

King crab is technically imitation crab meat.

I would call it mislabeled, since it's called crab but wasn't made to imitate crab.

a week ago

Man, you're not going to like the technicalities of what is and isn't a penguin...

a week ago

They wear tuxedos... right?
Right?

Lol, no.

Those are cats.

a week ago

Am I raising my cat wrong?

a week ago
a week ago

You know, if this guy went into at least a little detail about things that'd be nice.

a week ago

His work is geared towards introduction to concepts not full lectures.

a week ago

Crab people, crab people.

Taste like crab, talk like people.

a week ago

If crabs came from animals, why are there still animals?

Nature: "Give it time."

note to self: don't evolve into a crab

a week ago

apparently we won't because we're not modular enough

The semantics of this title makes my brain itch

Drill a small hole and you can scratch it

I like that it kinda implies that animals are spontaneously becoming crab often enough to be a problem.

a week ago

I mean, when you start categorizing things by phylogenetics instead of phenetics, you realize that certain body plans happen a lot more than expected.

a week ago , edited a week ago

Ok, when we're at 100 comments about the tittle, I will finally edit it

lol throw a colon after TIL and it's good enough.

lol throw a colon

I did, and now I'm no longer licensed to perform surgery!

Ring toss?

Nah, I was a gastric surgeon, not a proctologist or urologist πŸ˜‰

a week ago

sound like a plan

a week ago

Still hurts

Be careful what you ask for on Lemmy... :-P

Titillating

The title , yo

The big takeaway the casual reader should learn from this is that contrary to the memes it's not "animals" it's "crustaceans" and to some extent arthropods.

Apes won't evolve into crabs unless we do it deliberately.

Until we do it deliberately.

Ah fuck, you guys found the secret ape crab lab, didn't you?

Crabs are the most chaotic structures in the universe so, naturally, entropy will always create crabs as order moves to chaos.

a week ago , edited a week ago

I want to be one of those crabs that form a conga line and swap shells.

That'll be the hermit, ironically.

I've also heard kangaroos are further evolved, or more distinctly evolved, from our common ancestor than us.

No claws yet though. Having a biological pocket is cool.

Ahem. 🫣

a week ago

This title hurt me physically.

a week ago , edited a week ago

(V) (:,,:) (V)

a week ago

detritis